Ask me. Please.

I don't remember exactly when I developed this habit, but I observe people and try to figure out what makes them be themselves. You know, not in a cool, experimental way, but more like a 'Hello, fellow human being, who are you really?' way. But not in a creepy stalker way either. I think. Anyway, my point is, I've been doing this for quite some time now, and I've consistently been able to find some flaws/quirks in every person; as is, according to most people, completely normal. Nobody's perfect; you live and you work it, and all of that. But the way this makes me see all of it is that ,these people, they're giving away hints about themselves so easily; why? How dum are they? Do they not realise that, in just a matter of minutes, anybody can read them like a book? Why would they make themselves vulnerable like that? The way I see it, voluntarily offering bits of yourself to the outside world, by way of your dress or actions or expressions - aren't you afraid to let go of the only thing that's yours for sure, and always will be? When you wear large hooped earrings, and heels, what are people going to think of you? When you cover yourself up from head to toe, and keep your eyes down, what will still more people think of you? Will that make a difference, if you stopped showing those outward signs of yourself to the world? Will people ignore you, or will they develop a keener interest in you? When you wear blue big blue dangling earrings and walk down to the canteen at lunch, what are people thinking of you? Do they notice the spring in your step, the shine that is added to your smile?

I don't wear earrings any more. My grandmother even today told me that I should wear a chain around my neck. I wear blue rubber chappal everywhere I go. I rarely go out - bordering on the anti-social, if I were to be compared with most my age. I forget the point I was trying to make. I do that a lot, these days. I suppose I've let go of my coherence along with everything else. "Let go of my coherence". Is that right? I don't know.

I just saw my title again. I remembered my point. Basically, being one who reads people - we shall not get into parameters of accuracy or conjecture - and is awed by the way everybody projects themselves easily to anybody who's watching, I have tried very intently - because I was the stark opposite of this - to become invisible myself, because I don't want anybody to read me. Or judge me. If they want to, and choose to, know me, they must, quite simply, ask me. Ask, and thou shalt receive.

If you're wondering yes, that girl from the canteen was me.
Is me.
And that's the girl I want to be again. And that's the girl who is the namesake for this blog.